Parenting children

Hi-Ho, Hi- Ho, It’s Off to Work We Go OR How Not to Panic When You Discover Your Child Just Doesn’t Get It

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Let's say you just found out your kid is not quite up to where they should be.

Or maybe they're not even close to where They say they should be.

Or heck- let's just go all out. Let's say you knew they were behind, like, a while ago, but didn't do anything about it.

You had your reasons. Maybe some of them were even good, sensible ones. But, like the Road Runner when he realizes he's about to fall off of the cliff, it just hit you that you messed up big time.

So what.

Yep, you heard right. SO WHAT!

Now head to a mirror and sing to yourself, "I screwed up but I don't care!" to the tune of Oh, I'm a Lumberjack and I'm okay. Because life happens. Even the best of us don't get around to doing the stuff they should be doing, when they should be doing it .

So you have two choices: Suck it up, or suck it up. Meaning: you can accept the fact that you were off-track, and get to work, or you can wallow in guilt and chocolate (not a bad plan actually - just kidding). In which case you'll still have to suck it up, but it'll be gooey and lumpy and full of undigested particles.

Believe me, you don't want to do that.

And just to prove that stuff like this happens to be the best of us, I'll share with you the not-so-earth shattering revelation that hit me today:

This evening the kids and I spent some time reading books together. It was almost bedtime, but not quite close enough :), so I decided that instead of having them run around and get wild, I’d do a quiet, focused activity.

As we sat at the dining room table and read, I noticed that G., the 4 ½ year old is still having a lot of difficulty with her expressive language. Like many children with expressive language issues, she has plenty to talk about – except when you ask her something specific. In fact, usually I have to stop her from talking, since (as is also common with hyperactive girls) she often talks around, under, and over everyone else.

I’ve actually been quite concerned about her overall language development. Initially, I decided to go easy on her and let her develop at her own pace. She is very petite, and between her size and her behavior is very much like a child a year younger than her actual age.

I’m not always into pushing therapy on a child unless I have to, and since I had seen steady progress with her, I decided to just let her be.

But this year I’m noticing that her progress in language has pretty much slowed down to a crawl. There are a lot of things she has trouble remembering the names of, although about a third of the time she knows what it is once she’s told. And although her ability to remember what she’s learned in nursery school is a little better, it’s not even close to where it should be.

I could beat myself over the head about this: You should have found time. It doesn't matter that your daughter just got married and before that you moved to a new city, and that you have 2 other children with learning issues, one who just started first grade. You're SuperMom, right?

But I'm not going to. Chocolate is cheaper. And less painful. At least in the short run.

Yes, it does mean that there are now 3 kids that will need help. It will also mean that my gifted son't extra stuff is going to have to take the back burner - again. But that's life.

Anybody want a shovel?


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  • Rachel Dec 4,2011 at 11:53 am

    Isn’t that crazy? Especially when homeschool kids tend to cover ground a lot faster than kids in your standard school set-up.
    And even if they didn’t, that’s the whole point- to be able to go at your child’s pace.

    BTW- any baby news?:)

  • Laughwithusblog Dec 2,2011 at 10:37 pm

    Oh how I used to stress about keeping my kids up with the average. As a homeschool mom I have faced a lot of criticism from people and was so worried about keeping up…until I about drove myself and my children nuts. 🙂

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